so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
