Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Randomize
