Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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