I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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