Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
