Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
