Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Dick very happy bro
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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