I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
