i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I cut my penus on the lid.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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