She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
