He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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