# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
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