capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize