Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
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