the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
He shit in the fireplace
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
