I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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