it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
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