oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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