I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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