Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
