Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Your dad touched me again.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
