It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
