forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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