So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
