you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
