look no pants
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Randomize
