i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
