laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
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