i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
