i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
