So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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