Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
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