Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
These tits shall not be calmed
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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