areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
the liver wants what the liver wants
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
