u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize