I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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