Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
