this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
