Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
