Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
