Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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