Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
