its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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