What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
