how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
