4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize