Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Randomize
