I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
you inspire me to be a worse person
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
