States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
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