fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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