So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize