some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
she told me i tasted like america
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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